10 ways to develop head control in an infant

March 30, 2010

A friend has a daughter who was born a couple of months after Nisarga. She has hypotonia and is having trouble getting her daughter to do many things. She goes with him to a physiotherapist, but is feeling rather discouraged. As we chatted, I realized that with Nisarga having low muscle tone as well, and considering the amount of research and experimenting I do into encouraging movement, I had tons of very useful advice to offer.

We spoke about many milestones and specific motor achievements over a week or so of extensive chatting, and I am planning to share the ideas as different posts focused on specific subjects.

This one focuses on encouraging head control. Here are the different things I do (and some I haven’t yet done) with Nisarga:

Tummy time. Lots of it. If your baby doesn’t like tummy time, put them on their tummies, and pick them up the moment they complain. Don’t force them to endure it, but don’t stop providing opportunities. With Nisarga, I found that these things often depend on mood. Sometimes, he can lie on his tummy indefinitely, other times, he will start crying even before he hits the ground. So don’t be in a hurry to decide that your baby doesn’t like tummy time, it may simply be their mood – tired, hungry, gas, sleepy, etc.
Carry him upright. Carry in your arms, in a baby carrier…. this gives them opportunities to manage his head without having to lift it against gravity.
Lying chest to chest on you as you recline. This is a modified kind of tummy time where he doesn’t have to bear so much weight on his hands and can lift his head to look at your face – motivation and ease.
Put a rolled up towel under his armpits when on tummy to help him look up easier. N doesn’t really need this, as he’s happy to look up.
Carry him facing the floor with his tummy on your arm.
Swing him tummy down like an aeroplane
Encourage him to look around. Move toys so that he has to turn his head to see them, show him things as you carry him around, get others in the home to call him so that he turns to look.
One exercise I play is to sit him on my knees facing front. I look over one shoulder and call to him and give him a kiss. Then I do the same over the other shoulder. After a while he should start anticipating your moves and look at you and smile. (Not for very young babies, I guess)
Talk to him as you move around the room so that he turns to look at you. Most infants will naturally want to follow their parents with their eyes (mothers in particular)
Sit him on your knees or on a big rubber ball, hold him carefully and with enough support for his head, and sway him to music or a rhyme. You can also tilt him from side to side and front and back. Begin with small movements and move to larger movements only when he starts enjoying this. This helps him learn to make small corrections to keep his head upright.

Keep everything fun. It is not going to work if your child is resisting what is happening, since his energy will then not be with ‘flowing’ with the activity, but in avoiding it. Also, something fun for both of you is likely to be repeated regularly to coax laughs out of the little charmer than something that is an ordeal.

Categories: development, infant, milestone.

Tags: head control, motor development

Its a new day

March 5, 2010

Nisarga is in great spirits today. Laughing, talking with us and himself if we aren’t around, trying to get his feet to his mouth….

Its a busy life for a busy little baby.

We had our first bath in a bright inflatable tub I got from a friend, and Nisarga discovered that water can be splashed, and that it is all great fun. Unfortunately, since I was alone, I was not able to click pictures, but I will try and post some from our next bath. This little guy splashed furiously, and then grinned from ear to ear at what he was able to do.

I am learning to see the little delights of life.

When I had my bath after he was done, I splashed a little water too, and it was all great fun. It didn’t have a purpose, so I guess I didn’t do it anymore, but I find that the purpose of joy is good enough for me these days.

Categories: Daily Life, infant.

Our first tooth at 3 months!!!

December 14, 2009

I have been busy with a super needy baby for the past couple of days with no time to haunt this blog at all.

He has been fussy and clingy for the past couple of days, which is fine because I enjoy holding him, but sad because he seems so unhappy. I was wondering constantly about what his problem was. If you remember, I’d written a post the over a month ago, when he wasn’t even two months old thinking he was teething. Everyone assured me I was mistaken and that he was too young. Then, it seemed to ease and I believed I was mistaken too about the symptoms.

He’s been super drooly since then and tends to have whiny moods, which too everyone assured me was a part of growing up.

Today, as I looked into his mouth, there it was – a tiny white ridge over a very drooly gum. Its still not out, but its right there. Apparently, it will still take time to come out, and that’s what his discomfort is all about, but I’m glad to know that I did understand his body language correctly.

I feel so helpless sometimes to understand what my little man is trying to tell me.

Categories: health, infant, milestone, teething.

Funny Little Baby

November 28, 2009

Baby playing in his cradle

I was working at something on the computer, when Nisarga’s piercing wail scared me to bits. I jumped from my chair and rushed to him in record time. Imagine what this guy’s problem was?

He had woken up quietly and was playing on his own, I guess. These days, he grabs the rods on the side of the cradle. I found him like that, holding the rod strongly, and trying very hard to move his hand, crying in fear because it was stuck!!!

I opened his tiny fist from the rod and his hand shot free. I had earned myself a teary smile.

Bad, bad cradle had trapped my precious child

Categories: Daily Life, Humour, infant.

Tags: baby, funny, Humour

Caring for gassy infant – How to treat gas in infant

November 19, 2009

Here’s some tips on caring for gassy infants born from my trial by fire:

At the FIRST sign of gas – crying, squirming, passing very little gas after a lot of action… use neopeptine. I’d say, when in doubt, use neopeptine too.
Comfort baby. Cuddle in fetal position. This brings legs closer to stomach and naturally helps pass gas, while making the baby feel secure.
Feed baby. Babies tend to have bowel movements (or attempts) when feeding. The feeding comforts as well as helps them move the gas along.
Put some massage oil (coconut oil should be fine) on your hands and rub the tummy gently. G-e-n-t-l-y. You are not trying to squeeze the gas out. Just soothe and encourage movement.
Move the baby a lot. The squirming that is tiring your baby out is basically the baby moving to help pass gas. You can be a huge help to baby here. Rock, swing, exercise legs in bicycling motions, hold legs up like for a diaper change….. keep changing positions. The baby will not settle till the gas passes, so a position change is only temporary relief. Don’t let the infant get all worked up when it loses its effectiveness, move to a different position.
Of course, when a position soothes baby, hold it for longer, or move to something else quickly.
The end of the baby that gas is expected to exit has to be higher. Gas rises, remember? So, if your baby is moving his head restlessly, rocking back and forth, etc, hold him vertical, pat back, encourage burp. If he is squirming the whole body, drawing up legs and kicking them out, etc. Put horizontal and raise legs, cuddle in cradle hold, lightly rub small circles on lower back, etc.

These are things to do while your baby is suffering. If you are breastfeeding your infant, it might help to look into fore-milk hind-milk imbalance or lactose overload (NOT lactose intolerance), which I have written about earlier.

Categories: Digestion, health, infant, tips.

Infant ear pain

November 18, 2009

Another nightmare night.

Nisarg started fussing around bedtime and crying on and off. By 1am, he was crying full blown out. Screaming wails, hiccups, gasps, chokes, scary breathless sounds, constant screaming interspersed with exhausted and restless dozes he came out of within a couple of minutes.

I was scared. I woke up Raka around 4am feeling really scared, and the two of us spent another hour of the night feeling helpless, soothing, begging, bribing, whatever, but no go. By 5am, he was so tuckered out that he slept fitfully, sobbing at times in his sleep and waking up screaming if we put him down. So I held him, staring at that dear face with the swollen eyes, listening anguished to those slight sobs and gasps that continued as he slept.

Since he also was farting, I assumed it was a really bad case of gas.

By 6am, he was gone enough that he didn’t stir when I put him down, and I had a nap myself.

He woke up around 8am hungry, and slept through his feed and I put him back down. It was when he woke up screaming again at 11am that we got really scared and went to the doctor. The doctor thinks it might be his ear hurting him, since moving his head makes him cry more. She gave us something for it – Atarax drops. We are supposed to give 10 drops half an hour after Neopeptine for today, and without the Neopeptin for two more days. I guess we are covering our bases whether its ear pain or gas.

I think its gas because he passes wind when he cries and calms for a bit…. but then, is the wind passing from his straining when he cries, or is he crying because of it? Who knows? Its a chicken or egg thing.

Its such a horrible, horrible thing to see him in pain and not even be sure of what’s causing it.

He was crying again in the afternoon for a bit and then I think the medicine took hold. He’s sleeping as I write this. Totally deep sleep. This is crazy and not at all how I imagined being a mom to be. I’m willing to slay dragons and sacrifice whatever it takes for this guy, but hey, where is the dragon and what exactly is needed? No one told me it was such a tormenting guessing game!

Categories: ear pain, health, infant.

Baby massage – Research and Tradition

November 17, 2009

If you live in India and also learn about best practices from the net/books/doctor, its likely that you have the most conflicting opinions when it comes to baby massage and its tough to find out what to do.

This is a list of my conflicts and current decisions:

Smoke, kajal, powder, etc: Doctors say that the old practice of “dhuri” for the baby is not a good idea. In fact, lady from the free breastfeeding lectures by Breastfeeding Promotion Network of India goes ahead and says bluntly, “Its the woman who has given birth, not the baby. If you have such a strong belief that the warmth of the smoke creats strength, do what you want with the mother, but get the baby out of the room and away from the smoke.” Kajal carries risk of infection, may have traces of lead and can block the tiny tear ducts. Powder can get into a baby’s lungs and as such must not be used anywhere other than the diaper area if you must. No brainer there. I follow these guidelines and let the old women mutter about “today’s people”. That goes for oil in the ear, nose or any orifice.
Straightening legs: Its common practice in India to stretch the baby’s legs out to strengthen them. Fact is that the baby will “unfurl” in three months or so anyway. The fetal position is not something they can switch off at birth, and it brings them security, conserves energy and is actually quite a good thing. I tell the massage woman not to use force, and if the baby cries, then that is the end of whatever she is doing, and she must move to the next thing. It goes against her every idea of doing the best she can for the baby, so I really have to watch like a hawk on this and bluntly tell her that it is enough of something if the baby complains. And mostly he doesn’t.
Oil on the scalp: The fontanelle needs to be oiled to be closed is a common belief. Actually, like a cold lasts for a week or seven days depending on if you take medicine, the fontanelle will close approximately in two years or twenty four months depending on whether you oil it or not Pressure on the soft part is a bad thing. However, soft touch on the scalp is soothing, so I go by whether the baby seems to like it that day or not.
Exercise: The massage woman gently moves the baby’s limbs to exercise him. This is great and Nisarg loves it most days. When he doesn’t we don’t do it, because if he is jerking in resistance, I imagine it will do more harm than good.
Swaddling: A typical baby massage and bath will be followed by swaddling as sure as the sky is blue. The baby seems to enjoy it and sleeps soundly, so its great. However, this swaddling is typically done very tight, which can cause hip dysplasia in the baby. What I do is ensure that the baby is open and free most of the time, and loosen the swaddling when the woman goes.
Hair removal: The massage woman has talked herself hoarse in one ear with the mother in law in the other – the baby hair on his forehead must be removed, or he will turn into an ugly, hairy grown up. Needless to say, they talk, I listen, and do nothing in that direction. If hair removal were such a great idea, we’d encourage our four year old daughters to get their eyebrows trimmed. Hair removed will grow again, and any changes in appearance are cosmetic till the hair falls out on its own. If it were a permanent solution, there would be no need for permanent hair removal ads for grown ups. We’d all DIY at home.
Oil for baby massage: Okay, this is a big one. Doctors tell you to go with coconut oil. The massage woman will recommend edible oils but use whatever you provide. Fancy friends will insist that olive oil is the thing (a status thing, since olive oil is a “good”, exotic and expensive oil and no “commoners” in India have even heard of olives). Others would recommend Johnsons baby oil. Here’s what I found. Doctors and tradition solidly of the same opinion, and backed by my experience of the baby. Coconut oil wins hands down. Excellent for the skin, inexpensive, no undesirable reactions on the skin…. Olive oil caused rashes on Nisarg – for whatever reason. Johnson’s baby oil is a liquid paraffin based oil. NOT a good idea for massage, though I guess its fine for applying on the skin to keep it from drying. There have been many instances of skin rashes from this oil among people I know, online and people the massage woman knows. I have yet to hear of anyone regretting using coconut oil on a child. I have heard that almond oil is good too. A pediatrician friend said, “Don’t create such a production out of it. Use your mother-in-law’s coconut oil, almond oil, or cooking oil from the kitchen. If something creates a rash, discontinue it.”

So, what are your experiences with advice based on research, tradition and social opinions? How do you manage? What choices do you make?

Categories: health, infant.

Baby Signing Time

November 16, 2009

Okay, so I’m on a roll with educational resources for babies. Another absolutely awesome resource dropped into my lap last week. A friend with a grown up baby gave me the first episode of – Its Baby Signing Time!

The idea being that babies develop an awareness about their needs and desires long before they are able to express them. Thus, babies often cry out of frustration, because they are unable to get their needs met.

Teaching them the baby (read very basic) version of sign language empowers them to communicate more fluently with you, thus removing much of the stress of guesswork for both of you.

There is an additional bonus – research shows that children who gesture a lot learn to speak early and develop better mental abilities.

There are supposed to be four episodes, though I’ve seen only one. What we saw, we liked. Nisarg was entranced with the lively music and bright colours. I was entranced with how clearly and charmingly the whole thing has been created. Its literally lessons on sign language woven with music, words, and plenty of practice time. I had never imagined that learning could look so much like a fun video. Nisarg doesn’t understand anything at all, but approves anyway, if his stare and waving limbs are to go by.

He’s still young, but in a month or so, I guess we’ll have all the episodes.

Really, sign language is not just for deaf and dumb children, but for all children who are not able to speak – babies qualify.

Categories: development, infant, learning resource, recommended.

Tips on teaching a baby to clap

November 14, 2009

Oooookay, I think we have cracked the clap code (though not actually clapped), which if you consider that Nisarg is not even 3 months yet, is pretty amazing.

The little guy has figured out that its all about swinging his hands together, but doesn’t yet have the co-ordination to quite make them meet….

If you want to teach your baby to clap, and he just stares back and blows spit bubbles at you, the following tips might help:

Don’t hurry. ENJOY the fun you are having with baby, no matter what it ends up as. Babies sense you enjoying yourself, and it tempts them to enter the action you are leading.
Pick your time. Don’t just pester the poor darling morning and night. The idea is to find a time when baby is alert, awake and quiet.
Talk baby talk with your baby. Get his attention. You want him really looking at you, observing.
Clap with an exaggerated movement (with an obvious swing of your hands). Laugh and share the joke with baby and do more baby talk.
Do this a couple of times, and baby will likely get buzzed enough to wave his hands. Get all excited about that, and clap some more and wait, as though you are fully expecting him to do the same. If baby doesn’t respond, fine. Do something else. Repeating clapping a couple of times, or playfully clapping his hands together will work as interactive fun, but don’t turn it into a lesson. It will not make him clap, if he stops enjoying it.

This is it. The whole session. Praise whatever swings baby makes, and clap in response. Eventually, the little darling is going to figure out how to make the hands meet when he swings them.

Categories: development, infant, infant communication, tips.

Baby weight gain and bonnissan

November 13, 2009

I had written earlier about how Nisarg was having problems with gas and diarrhoea and the doctor had prescribed Bonnisan. Then I wrote about how after just two days, Nisarg had normal baby poop for the first time in his life.

Well…. half a month later, we haven’t had a single loose bowel movement yet, and Nisarg is filling up quite well, with chubbying cheeks and slight hints of plumpness that we associate with babies. I don’t think he’s ever going to be one of those round babies, but hey, he’s healthy, active and putting on weight steadily. He also put on an inch in height – he’s now 22 inches.

I don’t know what he weighs, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s put on a kilo from the last appointment to the next.

Maybe its just regular growth, but I’m of the opinion that the Bonnissan really helped. He just was cranky (for him) and slow to grow since the gas set in till before we started with it.

Categories: Digestion, growth, health, infant, poop, recommended.

Neopeptine drops for infants with gas

November 11, 2009

Okay, like I said that the baby’s loose bowel motions got sorted by Bonnisan, the other helpful miracle we had with the gas was Neopeptine.

This is apparently something with digestive enzymes, and it really helps cut the amount of gas discomfort the baby goes through. Unfortunately, it took us a while to discover how to use it.

So, if you are using Neopeptine for infant gas, here are some tips, which we wish someone had given us:

You have likely been advised to give Neopeptine only for extreme colic, like we were. This makes you tend to wait for quite some time before the baby’s screaming forces you to use it. Don’t wait. Use it at the first sign of gas.
If your baby is suffering from gas, don’t give doses only when he is in pain. Give them for a day or two, as long as you aren’t giving him more than three times, though we have given him four or even five doses once on the first day, when he was in a lot of trouble.
Give the drops before feeding.
Neopeptine helps baby move the gas easier, but you can help it along. Give drops, burp, feed, burp, wait for some time, burp again.
Moving the baby’s legs will also help him pass gas, which will not hurt your situation.

Have you used Neopeptine? How did you use it? How was your experience?

Categories: Digestion, health, infant, medicines, pain, tips.

Right brain development in infants

November 10, 2009

There is a wealth of information on right brain development in infants and how it can’t be started early enough and resources and all that. Like any other obsessed mother out there, I’m researching ways to entertain him in a manner that stimulates his development, and so far am doing pretty much exactly what came instinctively anyway.

Talking a lot to him, teasing him to win those smiles, carrying him around and showing stuff, making funny faces and exaggerated actions, etc.

The funny part is that the actions get him looking all solemn and puzzled at me when I’d have thought he’d laugh. He looks like he wants to ask “Hey, you okay? You seemed fine a minute ago”

What I’m planning to do:

Flash cards. He still sleeps most of the time, and seems supremely uninterested in the flashcards most of the time. So I guess this is going to be an acquired taste. At the moment, he’ll look at the cards very briefly and mostly look at my face as though trying to figure out what in the world I’m trying to do.
Touch: He gets his massage and bath every day, and we often cuddle at bedtime. Other than that, he loves touch in general. Stroke his head, body, face-but-NOT-nose, and he’s virtually purring. I give him lots of other stuff to touch too – the plastic of his toys – hard, soft, bags…, rubber mat, soft cotton swaddling cloth, other cloth materials, sponge, wood, …. whatever we can lay our hands on
Smell: So far, we like a couple of perfumes and sneeze at frying smells from the kitchen. Vicks , milk and baby powder are at the top.
Movement: I carry him around in my arms, in a sling…. lift him high, dance with him in my arms, … He pretty much enjoys it all indiscriminately
Mimicry: I do all kinds of stuff for him to copy. So far we have managed to stick our tongues out (both imitating me and when told), clap (sort of) and blink. He will suck instead of kiss, and we understand the sign for milk (I like to imagine), but can’t copy. I guess he’s too hungry and small to focus while hungry yet. Thing is, he enjoys all this stuff and is mostly waving arms and feet full power with that undecided half-smile on his face.
Music: He likes most music (other than a couple of really loud songs, and Anup Jalota) Favourites being nursery rhymes in Marathi, and Usha Uthups Karadi Rhymes followed closely by Shakti and Ghulam Ali.

And here I am, saying that I don’t get to do much because he sleeps so much. I guess its more about being aware of how much we are doing.

Categories: development, infant, infant communication, play time, tips.

Nightmare night

November 7, 2009

Last night Nisarg cried, and cried, and cried. Poor chap. He vomitted a couple of times, had loose stools, gas…. and was utterly miserable.

He wanted to be held all the time and still sobbed on and off.

Nothing worked. feeding, burping, music….

Just as I was about to rush him to the ER of the nearest hospital, he started nodding off, utterly exhausted. Poor little boy. Care….fully, I put him down, and after a few sobs, he was out. Such a tiny body, so tired from the discomfort and crying.

I was a goner too. I was tired myself, but all wired up. Sleep didn’t matter if I could just bring him some comfort…. Luckily, at 4am, this nightmare story ended from sheer exhaustion on his part. After staying awake for another half hour or so to just be sure that he was ok, I slept like a log.

He woke up in the morning with a ear destroying scream, and I was like, “Not again….”. I began telling Raka how we were taking him to the hospital immediately after feeding, and he started getting ready.

Just to be contrary I think, Nisarg drank and drank and drank like he was starving, belched like a drunk sailor, and was peacefully sleeping before his burping was done. He didn’t even stir as I put him down.

Raka and I looked at each other in disbelief. Apparently, the guy was just hungry after his difficult night.

I’ve been looking at him warily all day, but so far, so good.

Categories: Digestion, health, infant.

Teething before 2 months

October 30, 2009

Is Nisarg teething?

Everyone I shared this doubt with thinks I’m nuts. For one, he was born early. For another, he’s not even two months old yet. Its supposed to begin after four months and supposed to be even later for babies who come early.

Since yesterday, he’s been fussy on and off for no apparent reason. I put him down to nap, then he wakes up almost immediately after, except for the night, which so far continues to be blessedly smooth.

He’s suddenly started drooling, biting his fingers and sometimes (rarely) sucking his knuckles. I can see two white bits under the gum where his two lower front teeth could come. I can also feel those teeth with my finger, though they are inside.

To me, it really seems like he’s teething.

Dayum, this motherhood thing is one thing after another. Seems just yesterday I was complaining about not being able to sleep because of backaches from a huge front. Now, I can sleep very well, but am still exhausted. First the birth, then coming home, breastfeeding every two hours, diarrhoea, gas pains, figuring out pee communication, worrying about his weight gain all through and just as I was celebrating two days of a regular healthy infant, its now this teething thing, or something that seems remarkably like it.

Anyone else had a child that teethed this early? Developmentally, he should be counted a month old or something. He’s still very tiny and not on the weight charts for his age at all. I’m just hoping that this doesn’t create a setback in his weight gain….

Categories: development, growth, health, infant, milestone, teething.

Teaching baby to clap

October 28, 2009

Okay, let me say that I tried, and he seems to get it, but I have no clue how it happened.

I noticed that he will try and imitate things I do, so I made faces. He will stick his tongue out when I stick mine out. He will stare at my face when I smile with no intention of copying. He will smile when I raise my eyebrows with no movement other than blinking around his eyes…

Another stage in this saga was me trying to teach him to clap. I clapped my hands when he was paying attention, and he gave me one of those intent stares that make it clear he has no plans of doing any such thing. Small claps make him all puzzled, and ones where I move my hands obviously entertain him, but no go on doing it himself.

Until this morning. Raka had to leave really early, so we woke up around 5am. Imagine my surprise to see Nisarg next to me wide awake, and clapping!!!

Well, they were not real claps. Sometimes the hands came to the center at slightly different times, other times he hit his stomach, still other times, he brought his hands together and clasped them tight. However, there was no doubt that he was trying to clap.

I promptly sat in front of him and clapped without a sound to help him see the movement, and his legs got into the fray, kicking into the air with excitement. He tried once more.

And… that’s it.

We went back to staring at me while I clapped.

Looks like my guy was trying to clap as a part of playing with his hands and didn’t appreciate the distraction of mom teaching something.

Hmmm… so if you’re trying to teach your baby to clap, here is what I suggest you do:

Please share in a comment how you managed to do it.

Categories: development, infant, infant communication, play time.

Elimination communication at 7 weeks old

October 27, 2009

Yesterday, I realized that Nisarg cried for a couple of minutes before peeing, and was able to rush him to the wash basin in time to take a diaper free leak quite a few times. I was thrilled, right until before the MIL told me to call up the doctor. Why is it that the baby is crying when he isn’t even wet yet? He must be in pain.

There went my joy at having successfully conquered the gas pains a couple of days ago. In a panic, I called up the doctor, who was busy, busy again, and again, till I could have reached throught the phone to yank the receptionist’s hair and to tell her that this was an emergency!

Finally, I was able to speak with her, and…. anti-climax. Like so many of my worried calls, this one barely rated a yawn. No, nothing to worry about. Babies do it. He will grow out of it….

Why in the world was everyone acting like this was a bad thing to be concerned about or grown out of?

It looked to me that my baby was telling me clearly that he didn’t like being wet, and was crying in anticipation of the upcoming wet, or to tell me, or from fighting the losing battle to prevent the wet…. In any case, it told me that he needed to take a leak and to provide him with appropriate support. Which is good, right? Isn’t that the direction to grow in in any case?

He’s small. So what? He just doesn’t like being wet.

Just to test, I put a disposable diaper on him, like for the night, and he didn’t cry for hours. Possibly, because it doesn’t let him get uncomfortably wet like the cloth ones. So obviously it wasn’t pain from passing urine.

The other mystery got solved in a flash of insight. Why was he telling us so clearly all of a sudden? I realized that he was telling me all through, but what with the gas making him cry all the time, and my own incompetence with understanding him, I didn’t realize till the Bonnisan drops cured the gas and thus the overtiredness. Once the clutter was removed, the normal crying for communication remained, making it seem like it started suddenly.

This was further “confirmed” when I woke up from a nap to change his diaper. I knew that I had to change his diaper even before the crying registered fully and I awoke. Indeed, he was about to take a leak. So somewhere, unconsciously, I had learned to recognize his “pee” crying.

Wow!!!! It suddenly makes me feel like I understand him so much better.

Update: So much for my excitement. This is actually a method to train babies to potty A reader here, Laurie has shared the following links:

http://www.TimL.com/ipt
http://www.pottywhisperer.com

I’ve read them very briefly, but they seem informative. Looks like Nisarg and I discovered a very good way of learning to toilet train all by ourselves. See, I knew this guy was smart. Thank you Laurie.

Update two: Oops. Looks like “Elimination Communication” is a method too. A friend called it so, and I thought she was just talking about what I was telling her happened with us….

Categories: development, infant, infant communication, potty training.

Bonnisan works miracles with gassy infant!!!

October 25, 2009

Of course I did a whole load of searching on Bonnisan, and then tasted it myself before even showing baby the bottle….

I’d read all kinds of nice things about it, which kind of reassured me, and the taste is nice – similar to gripe water, so initially I didn’t know what the doctor’s big deal about the whole thing was.

I found out for myself within our first day on the medicine. Two doses in, and the gas pains were audibly lower. Baby was sleeping better, more cheerful and eating more.

We are now into our second day and WOW!!! Nisarg is back to the sweet tempered baby he was before this gas nightmare began. He hasn’t pooped all day today after every day since birth being an experience of a constantly pooping bottom. He still has gas, but its much less and he can pass it without going through agony for every fart or spraying poop along with it. His body just seems so limp and relaxed after feedings.

I’d reached the end of my rope with this gas thing, and desperately needed a miracle. Looks like I got one.

If I add my experience with this medicine, with the research I read, I don’t know why doctors don’t simply prescribe this off the bat, or at least at the first sign of trouble. Its a digestive tonic that does so many things. Just Google it. No point having to suffer through my half baked jargon.

Categories: Digestion, development, growth, health, infant, medicines, pain, poop, recommended.

Tips to increase intake and weight gain of breastfed baby

October 25, 2009

My son, as you all know is underweight and breastfed. Like any concerned mother, I want to see him put on weight consistently. This led me to really look for ways to up his intake and make the best of what he will eat. These insights were priceless and difficult to find on the net – took a lot of careful observation and experimenting.

The milk you feed him. Excess of foremilk and not enough hindmilk will cause gassiness. We know that – lactose overload or foremilk hindmilk imbalance. But why does getting enough hindmilk resolve this? Because hindmilk contains fats in addition to all that the regular stuff in the foremilk and the more the breast is empty, the more fats the milk will contain, making it travel slower through the intestines and get more time to be digested. So, if you have a good milk supply, pump off foremilk and then put the baby to breast. This way, what little quantity the baby drinks will have more calories in it, in addition to saving energy spent in gas pain, fussiness, etc.
Feed at first cues of hunger. Okay, so we can’t always recognize them… Really, when in doubt, offer. When your baby starts following you with his eyes, offer. When baby has been awake for a while since previous feed, offer. If its hot weather and he could be thirsty…. Whatever. Offer. I was really surprised to see how much more than “every two hours” my baby would want to eat. If you catch the hunger before it reaches desperation and fussiness levels, your baby will be that much calmer and eat more.
Don’t stop feeding when your baby takes a break. Often my son will stop drinking because he wants to burp or poop or pee. Getting that done will see him drinking again, if I offer, but he’s not hungry enough to fuss. (He will look at me constantly or stare at my breast though). After burping always offer to continue feeding if baby wants. If you miss this, he’ll just end up asking that much sooner, or god forbid, if you are a time table mom or don’t figure out he’s hungry, he’ll go partially hungry.
Sometimes the baby plays with the nipple, rubs head against breast, arches back alternating with mouthing the nipple, cries, etc. He is NOT refusing milk. He is hungry, but is uncomfortable and can’t focus on it. Most of the time, burping will do the trick, or try calming him, waiting for a poop, helping him release gas. Whether it works to resolve the discomfort or not, sometimes you manage to help enough that he can now drink comfortably.
Don’t soothe a hungry baby when you could feed him. Won’t work for long anyway, and aren’t you trying to increase his growth? Hunger is an opportunity. Even if it means he is eating all the time. If he is constantly asking to feed, obviously he is constantly feeling hungry. Don’t analyse it – “how could he be hungry again so fast?” etc – obviously he is. How doesn’t matter. Could be because he didn’t feed enough last time, or burped after that and now has more space or a growth spurt, or whim/weather…? Sometimes Nisarg will eat almost all the time, and when he settles again, his meals will have increased in size – a growth spurt in appetite?

These tips together probably doubled my son’s intake within a couple of weeks and kept the good doctor beaming in approval though his weight is still off the charts low.

Categories: breastfeeding, infant, newborn, tips.

6week doctor's appointment

October 23, 2009

We had our third doctor’s appointment today. Ever since I started surfing the net and discovered that my baby was “near-term” and “underweight” I’ve been obsessing about getting him on the charts. So much for accepting the baby how it is.

On some level, I think its good for Nisarg that I’m obsessing over his weight, because it makes me extra attentive to his needs. So maybe the mothering instinct is not completely absent when faced with charts….

Anyway, this time, his weight was 4.35kg, which is a gain of 831 grams since the last visit a month ago. Good. He is still off the charts low though. I was thrilled to know that regular charts don’t represent normal breastfed babies and are too high, but unfortunately, he is still low on the WHO charts for breastfed babies. His height is in the third percentile though.

Anyway, the other thing I was obsessing about was vaccinations. We could get them done for free in the government facilities (which I’ve heard are very good), but the darling would get 4 injections instead of the combined vaccine and Hepatitis-B which is only two with the pediatritian. Plus, they are supposed to be painful and cause swelling and fever. I’m terrified of injections myself, and no way would I let my love suffer from a single prick that could be avoided. Plus, the government vaccines won’t do HiB, which protects from pneumonia, influenza and whatnots. Thus, I talked myself out of the cheapest option.

Then the doctor had two options a cheaper one (not really) that was still painful, and a more expensive one which would be “hardly noticed”. Not an easy choice considering how the better one cost twice the other. At Rs.1300/- and 2500/- neither were exactly cheap. Hmm… so I see this baby thing is not going to be a moneysaver.

Anyway, we went, celebrated our weight gain, and got our vaccines with no pain other than that to my wallet.

Considering how Nisarg has been suffering from a loose bowel since birth, I was determined to not leave without some answers. The reading on lactose intolerance had helped, but he was still gassy and still passed motions continuously through the day, though not in as much pain as before.

This time, I talked about the neo-peptin and the gripe water. When I brought up the gripe water, the doctor said to not give it (again) and with a sigh scribbled out a prescription for something called Bonnisan.

Thus armed, we have come home. Hopefully, the direction to travel is greater comfort, joy, love and all that.

Categories: Digestion, growth, infant, pediatrician.

Supporting an infant's neck

October 22, 2009

You look at that fragile little thing and your heart flutters with fear for its safety. You are so scared of jerking that flimsy neck supporting that big head, that you take a full minute before the baby transfers from the bed to your arms.

Well…. Life has a way of enforcing efficiency, as has confidence and observation. Trust me, I learned, and then had conversations with the doctor, other experienced people….

The first sign you get that you may be being too careful with the infant’s nect is when you want to snatch your baby back from the doctor when s/he handles him. Fact is, most infants are able to take movement of the neck comfortably. What you want is to avoid jerks, head dropping from gravity, and such horrible things.

Most of the time, if you are picking up your baby with a hand under its head, you are already doing things right. If you are supporting it in the crook of your arm, that works too, as do many other ways.

Most people will advise you to be super careful, under the belief that better safe than sorry. However, it doesn’t help if you fear damaging your child for life each time you pick him or her up. Babies will move their heads at will and often correct uncomfortable head positions themselves. Sometimes they will nod their heads to angles beyond what they are able to control, and the head will suddenly flop.

My technique is to keep my arm/hand or other body part or soft surface loosely and attentively ready to “catch” the head if it tries to go more than the baby’s usual range of movement. However, I don’t see the sense in immobilizing my son so much that he strengthens his neck through fighting restraints rather than attempting normal movement. This has gotten me grief from my mother-in-law who always holds him like he’s strapped to a splint. However, it hasn’t even earned me a whimper of discomfort from my son.

I don’t think nature ever intended us to keep our offspring unnaturally rigid till some predecided date when they miraculously started not needing support. Nisarg learns to hold his neck every day and keeps getting better at it. He can now raise his head easily when sleeping on his tummy, turns to look in every direction, and will often rub his forehead on my chest or bang his head on my breast himself. He doesn’t seem to have suffered from the wear and tear.

If you are still trying to figure out how and how much to support your infant’s neck:

provide support under neck and head for all horizontal positions, but it is not necessary to restrict any voluntary movement.
Provide support underneath for diagonal positions and be attentive for baby’s movements moving head to positions he can’t control or recover from and and situations where gravity could tax the neck muscles and cause the head to drop. This includes pulling into sitting positions for example
When holding baby upright, there is no real need to keep holding head, though positioning him so that he can rest on your chest or shoulder and keeping one hand on is a good idea. Don’t “hold”, just keep it there for comfort and readiness.

Categories: infant, newborn, tips.

Travel tips to India

October 12, 2009

While searching for diaper rash because I wanted to know what its like, I came across a page with the stupidest information for visitors traveling to India with infants. Not only is it factually incorrect, it stinks of pseudo superiority.

I have a lot of friends who are foreigners (as in non-Indians). Many of them have kids. Some bring their kids here, a few have given birth in India. The top three things I hear from parents of infants about their India experience are:

The tradition of post-partum massage in India totally rocks. Its the ultimate in pampering, and the stomach binding methods really help new moms get back into shape.
India is a place to be experienced anew through the wonder of a young child.
If you want to potty train your kid, bring him to India, and let a few of the grannies at him/her. Quick, painless and blessed freedom from marathon diapering.

I also know quite a few Indians who have settled abroad. These people seem to have lost touch with their sense of wonder in their need for looking down at the very things they grew up and flourished on. Take for example this article with its snobbish approach.

Number one problem in India is mosquitoes! Wow!!! And what problems Harish faces with them. Mosquito nets are too hot, coils are a bad idea (I agree). odomos is unsafe for children, and to bring electronic repellents before entering India. This guy has seriously lost touch with what India has become. Whatever happened to the liquid repellents like All out? Odomos works fine on kids as young as you like as long as you don’t apply it on areas babies suck – hands. I don’t even know that it does harm if applied to hands.
Water is a big problem. Sure – in some places, but bringing a kettle from US of A to boil it? The smallest roadside dhaba will give you all the boiled water in a clean utensil you want for free. Never mind the relatives you have come to meet.
Infant formula can be found in one store in Mumbai? Is this guy nuts or totally clueless about shopping for babies? Its more like one store every 5 minutes in any direction.
Not to bring babies under 2 years, one year etc. And here I was, an idiot for thinking that breastfed babies would have better immunity as well as make water problems irrelevant. Though if the guy has “psuedo-civilized” enough, he probably thinks breastfeeding is something the primitive Indians do and real babies thrive on formula.

Oh, I could go on and on and on…. but one thing leaps to my mind. Cheerful parents make cheerful babies and fussy parents make fussy babies. What wonder is it if the baby keep suffering because that seems to be all the parent can see?

While I hate to stereotype, this is such a glaring pattern, that I’d be lying if I’d de-nationalized it.

The British have left India, but the hangover of inferiority remains. For many people in India, reaching a place where they are better than other Indians imprisons them from appreciating what is, in their hunt for what’s wrong. They can relocate, but the mind remains in their prison of insecurities. There are two ways to be higher my friend. One is to life life to our best. The other is to push everything near us down. Guess which is easier, and which is more satisfying.

On the other hand, non-Indians enter India with a desire for discovery, prepared fully to enjoy their visit, and they find an enriching experience and adventure in the same land with the same number of shops and availability of products.

We can choose to win or whine. Remember, we will soon have echoes of our words coming out of our children’s mouths. What is the world we want them to discover? What is the attitude we want to encourage?

Categories: infant, travel.

Baby's first real smile

October 10, 2009

Okay guys, Today, I’m on top of the world.

I woke up to see Nisarg already awake and quiet next to me and wanted to spend some quiet time with him. I picked up a rattle and showed it to him, cooing “Good morning!” and some random nonsense. Nisarg stared quietly and very seriously at the rattle, as he licked his left little finger and suddenly bestowed a thousand watt beaming smile complete with toothless gums all the way!. Then he looked at me, gave another brilliant smile and looked back at the rattle.

He’s been smiling on and off when he’s drowsy, but this is the first “intelligent” smile. He went all out with it. What a way to begin smiling, and what a glorious way to begin my day!!!

I wish I had a camera handy to capture this incredible bit of sunshine for today.

BTW, if you are trying to make your little one smile, here is what I did if it helps. Not that it helped when I tried it a couple of hours later…

I came into the picture, when he was receptive
I was quiet and didn’t overwhelm him
I showed him something (interesting is a matter of perspective in this case, I think)
I paid attention and was appropriately delighted with his first smile.

I think, it was basically more about him being ready to smile – his age, state and stimulus.

He’s five weeks, so its about the right time for him to begin smiling.
He was in a quiet mood, when he didn’t have to worry about hunger or poo or pee or discomfort
His favourite person (at least the one he is most used to) was paying him undivided attention and showing something that was interesting without making too loud a noise that worries him (shaking a rattle makes him look, but not much else)

If you’ve found this post because you’re trying to get your little one to smile, good luck!

If you are an experienced parent, do share your ideas for coaxing more smiles….

Categories: infant, milestone.

Tips for infant gas pain

October 2, 2009

We had gas pain again last night.

This time around, I was able to comfort him in an hour…. which is too long for my baby to be in pain…

What worked was:

Playing his favourite music
Cuddling to comfort him
Breastfeeding to comfort him
Patting and stroking his back while cuddling to help him burp
Raising his legs like for a diaper change to help him fart
Doing leg exercises like cycling, pressing knees to stomach, etc

Feeling troubled about giving gripe water when the doctor said not to, I gave it anyway and discovered that burping him immediately after the gripe water provided greater relief than just giving it to him. He burped at least two times, maybe five (couldn’t be sure if those were burps).

Categories: Digestion, breastfeeding, health, infant.

Gas trouble for my baby

October 1, 2009

We had our first horrible night.

Nisarg just cried and cried and cried for 3 hours. We felt so helpless.

He woke up screaming bloody murder. Poor baby had gas. Every little while, a pain built and he screamed and squirmed and kicked out with his tiny feet in agony, and all we could do was look on helplessly as all our comfort methods failed. If there was ever a moment parents could be fired for failing their babies, it was this one….

I tried everything I could. Rocking, singing, talking, cuddling, massaging, feeding at the breast, bottle, moving his feet to help expel the gas. Everything worked for a minute or so, and the poor tyke was back to yelling. I have never felt so helpless or under prepared. The doctor had given us some drops and they helped, but it was about an hour after he had started crying that we thought to give them….

He had cried so hard that he was still having tiny sobs after he finally drank milk and slept. The morning brought some relief, but it was back to the same screaming inconsolably a while later.

Am at my wits end. Called the doctor, and she simply said that these things happen and to comfort him how we could.

Mother in law says to give him gripe water everyday, but the doctor shot down the idea earlier. She repeated it again, and again, and again, till we got some and gave it to him. Not much of a difference though he does like the taste.

On an internet expedition to find out what I can do to help him.

Categories: Digestion, breastfeeding, health, infant, pain, pediatrician.

Milk coma in infants?

September 22, 2009

I learned a new term today – milk coma.

Apparently it is the state of the baby after it has fed well, and can barely keep his eyes open. Like this:

Talk about drunk

That’s it – not a drop more!

I used to call it Niarg getting tipsy on milk and then blackout, but “milk coma” describes it good too….

Categories: breastfeeding, infant, newborn.

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